Why did I start Inbox of Purpose? Because no one has it all figured out!

It took a very long time for me to realise that a lot of people are confused about a lot of things, but we act like we aren’t. i.e. whom to date, course to study, the perfect role, the person to marry and so on!

This thing called ‘adulting’ is a confusing thing. It’s like you are just supposed to have the answers to everything and if you don’t know you are a ‘waste man’. Consult Google my friend, if you don’t know what that means.

When I finished University, I was a little distressed, heartbroken and confused. Had no clue what I was going to do with my life, so I decided to go to Music School for three months. What can I say! I loved it; the people, my teachers, my friends and the subject itself.

Those three months were more blissful than my three years at University. I hated my time at University. I liked being away from London, but I hated my course. Who else felt like this?

It goes like this. We pick a subject to study at A-Levels. Then we pick, the University we want to go to and then if we get the grades, we spend three years exploring the course we chose at age 16 or 17? And then hopefully once we graduate we get a job in that field and work our way up and become a manager or head of department and then at some point we have a mortgage and spend the next 10-25 years paying it off and then we retire and then move to Spain or somewhere hot to enjoy whatever is left of our lives. What a life. That sounds mad boring!

This my friend is called ‘adulting’

Ask yourself this. How many people at University choose the wrong course and had to stick with it? How many people at work are stuck in a job they hate because they have bills to pay? How many people are stuck with a partner they don’t like because they have kids together or they do not want to be homeless? This my friend is called ‘adulting’ aka get on with it and suck it up.

Thinking back. I was kinda lucky. I finished music school and immediately landed a job in marketing and I’ve been in it ever since. But often, I wonder, if I am on the right path. I know there’s more. I feel there’s more. My inner voice tells me there’s more but I can’t tell you what ‘more’ is.  

Fake Goals

When I was at University my goals were to work for an international organisation such as Microsoft or Google, not only would it make me happy, but it would be great for my ego and it would look great on my CV.

When I was started working my goals were to start a million-pound business lol. Be like a Zuckerberg. Not only would this make me happy but then I can travel around the world lol and live on a beach somewhere.

Now in my thirties, I only have one goal. To live life on my own terms, which for me is a combination of financial, mental, physical, spiritual and emotional success. And to create time for myself, my partner/children, my family and my friends. In short, make good money, love what I do and make time for myself and my loved ones. What a lot of people don’t realise is, success needs to be holistic. The three triple-braided cord.  

What good is it to work for a FTSE 100 company yet not have time for yourself? What good is it to run a successful company like Facebook but you do not have time for your family? Vanity of vanities; all is vanity. Tufiakwa.

I’m trying to stop setting goals based on my ego and based on what looks good on Instagram and LinkedIn. I have a new definition of success. I see success as a balance of masculine and feminine success. In today’s society, we define success in masculine terms. To be successful you need to be an author which you should list on your LinkedIn page, receive a few awards, own a 7-figure business and so on. That’s great and everything but that’s just accolades. But I also see success in feminine terms, which to me is to raise well-balanced children or Dogs, Cats or Cattle – I think you get my drift! Also, to build relationships with your friends and family and take time to nurture your mind, body and soul.  

What type of content should I expect to see on Inbox of Purpose? 

Inbox of Purpose is my safe space, where I journal through the confusion of it all. This blog is about having honest dialogue and sharing how we can do life better and together.

So, what should you expect to read on this blog?

• Soulmates. Why I don’t believe in them
• Why Men ghost on Women like Casper
• Power in being vulnerable
• Social media and mental health
• Masculine and feminine success
• You don’t need to have closure from a relationship. Yes, you do BITCH!
• YouTube influencers are destroying our mental health. Blood sucking vampires
• The 5 Levels of Leadership: how to maximise your potential
• Follow your passion? Bad advice